Posted by: martinworster | October 30, 2008


We're fucked...


According to a United Nations report, it is now officially the worst time to be alive. The report collated evidence from different historical eras, including the dark ages and medieval times, concluding that the dawn of the 21st Century is the worst time to exist. Threats to the world, from and including global warming, nuclear war, religious war, terrorism, fuel and food shortages, extreme poverty gaps, economic meltdown, water shortages, over population and all the other, as yet unamed, perceived threats mean that the thread supporting humanities existence has never been thinner. The report recommends finding some sand and burying your head in it as you sob yourself slowly to death.

Despite massive advances in science and technology, humanitarian developments such as civil liberties, the abolition of slavery, the ending of apartheid, the emanciaption of woman and an ending to canibalism, collectively humanity seems to have missed the opportunity to act cohesively to prolong and enhance civilisation.

The report found the clinging onto outmoded, primitive and superstitious beliefs – yes, religion – to be one of the major stumbling blocks. Religious beliefs were found to divide large groups of people who followed conflicting dogmas that propagated ignorance, prejudice and disharmony. Despite overwhelming scientific evidence mounting daily against religion as a means of explaining existence and the creation of the world, a baffling amount of people still clung onto these beliefs.

The report also lay some blame at the post war ‘Baby Boomer’ generation for following greedy and selfish lifestyles, leaving the onus on younger generations to clean up the mess.

The report recommended a capping on human population through mass sterilisation (as in 1970s India) and a limit of two children only families (like in China) to combat massive overpopulation and limiting the strain on the planets already massively over stretched resources. Also, to move foward positively, the report recommended freeing yourself from the chains of religious thought, living more ethical lives, consuming less, loving everyone no matter age, race, colour or nationality and realising we are all in this together, doing our best every day, not to be greedy and to take reusable bags when doing your grocery shopping as there is an island of plastic bags the size of England floating in the middle of the Pacific that also leaves man(and woman)kinds existence hanging like a thread…

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